As I sit on my bed watching Supernatural, I’m also debating what to write. I’m asking my self a few questions, how many time are you going to re-design this blog and change your niche? The answer is I don’t know. The way I’ve been treating this blog refelts how I’m treating myself!
Recently I’ve been going to counselling. This has helped me to understand myself and to get to the cause of my problems. I’ve learnt that I’m a people pleaser, I want everything to be perfect, while in reality, I need to look after ME! I’ve missed out on enjoying life due to anxiety and depression and not taking chances when they arise. This is my second time getting counselling, the first time was at University. I basically went because I had to go. I acted the way they wanted me to because I wanted out of there. It didn’t help because they were more general and not specific to my needs.
You are not weak because you ended up in hospital. You are strong, you are a warrior!!!
Working with my Inner Critic has changed how I feel and think about my self. Rachel Eddins, 2018, says “We all have one — an inner voice that expresses criticism, frustration or disapproval about our actions. It might sound like, “you should,” “why didn’t you?” “what’s wrong with you?” or “why can’t you get it together?” The actual self-talk is different for each of us, as is its frequency or intensity”
Mines is ‘You’re worthless/ you’re an embarrassment.’ As I type these word my stomach is in knots. It’s the first time I’ve said this word that Isn’t with my therapist Lisa. I’m scared, why I’m I saying this? This blog is my Journal on my progress to develop self-worth and self- love!
How To Overcome Your Inner Critic?
The first step is to identify what your critical inner voice is telling you. Then to acknowledge that this thought process is separate from your real point of view. REMEMBER that your critical inner voice is not a reflection of reality. It is a viewpoint you adopted based on destructive early life experiences and attitudes directed toward you that you’ve internalized as your own point of view.
The next step is to help you differentiate from your critical inner voice is to write these thoughts down in the second person (as “you” statements). For example, a thought like “I can’t get anything right. I’ll never be successful” should be written as “You can’t get anything right. You’ll never be successful.” This will help you see these thoughts as an alien point of view and not as true statements. Notice how hostile this internal enemy can be.
You can answer to your inner critic by scribbling down a more realistic and compassionate evaluation of yourself. Write these replies in the first person (as “I” statements). In acknowledgement to a thought like, “You’re such an idiot,” you could write, “I may struggle at times, but I am smart and competent in many ways.” This exercise isn’t intended to build you up or boost your ego but to show a kinder, more honest attitude toward yourself.
Remember not to behave on the directives of your inner critic. Consider actions that embody your own point of view, who you want to be and what you aim to accomplish. Your critical inner voice may get louder, telling you to stay in line or not to take risks. However, by identifying, separating from, and acting against this destructive thought process, you will grow stronger, while your inner critic grows weaker.
For the next few weeks, I’m going to listen to my inner voice and write down every time ‘You’re worthless/ you’re an embarrassment’ pops into my head. Through all aspects of my life, to understand how often these words affect me.
Thank you for taking your time to read this, I appreciated it. And thank you to psychalive. org for the relevant information.